These Things I Believe

The impetus for starting this Substack

1.

In an episode of the Simpson’s called “Homer the Heretic,” Homer skips whatever Protestants call Mass to instead lounge around the house in his robe. At one point in his apostasy he’s listening to the Bill and Marty radio show. Homer sits down on his couch with a cup of coffee and we hear the following DJ banter:

BILL: That was Johnny Calhoun with ‘Gonna Find Me a Genie with a Magic Bikini.’

MARTY: Of course his next record was a spoken word album of his right wing political views. It kinda killed his career. If you can tell me the name of that album, call our contest line now!

Homer jumps up and fishes the following album from his collection…

…dials the contest line, and Bill and Marty declare him the winner. (Despite, as any Simpson’s fanatic will tell you, misreading the album title as “This Things I Believe.”)

Who, since January of 2017, does not fear meeting Johnny Calhoun’s fate? Simply stating the things we believe feels dangerous. At some point after that month I found myself careful saying what I thought, even if the thing was something the average Obama voter believed and said aloud all the time in 2012.

I’ve had enough of that. So, I am here on the only outlet I know of, Substack, which has explicitly staked out a free speech position and a pledge to respect all views (short of doxxing, porn, spam, etc.) My last blog was on Weebly and I’ve got some problems with the software or whatever, so I’ve been thinking of relocating it— but I wonder, does Wordpress respect free speech? Will Square Space succumb to a mob if I post a dubiously offensive thing? Which platforms might deplatform me for wrongthought, and which have pledged not to? As far as I know, only Substack has said it won’t.

It is not delusions of grandeur which are motivating me but the opposite: I know I am just a random citizen, and not someone with a big megaphone. I don’t intend to throw bombs or anything— ideally, I will mainly write about books I read, do some journaling, and maybe talk advanced pork shoulder theory. I don’t pretend to have any influence nor do I aspire to any. I expect to have few readers— which is all the more reason to write in a place that has already pledged to leave me be should I ever express a heterodox opinion.

2.

The process toward the illiberalism that dominates social media was gradual, but it seems to me to have happened in two phases. First, there was a social sanction phase; second, an official sanction based on a fear of the social sanction.

The social sanction: When J.K. Rowling is attacked for saying that she “supports trans rights but…”, her detractors are not really expecting to silence her. They are attempting to silence everyone who might agree with her. The process here is social only. It’s unofficial, even casual. You get mad or you act mad—does not matter which—and you scare enough people into silence. You repeat this again and again and again until no one in their right mind might say, “I support trans rights but…” No, the message goes, There is no ‘but.’ There is no gray area, no room for disagreement. Support is total, complete, absolute—or your point of view is actually an attack, literally violence.

Whether prominent voices lead the mob or literally anonymous ones, the people who deploy this tactic are explicitly illiberal and obviously unpleasant. We see what happens to Rowling, and we fear it happening to us. We also know if it happened to us it would be worse, especially if we have any ambition at all.

The official sanction: When this social sanction goes on long enough, when the topics for this all-or-nothing treatment are expanded to enough topics and issues, those who hold actual power take notice and turn the social sanction into official rules.

At this point, those with ambition fully learn the lessons. They know that they are more Johnny Calhoun than J.K. Rowling. That is, Rowling may have Fuck You money, and her books may be too popular to remove from the shelves, but the rest of us are expendable—and so is our work. The things we believe actually can cost us our careers. (Again, despite those things being not only common, but common among Obama voters not so long ago.) The mob speaks, and people are fired, pushed out of charitable foundations, removed from TV shows and movies, their books are disappeared from shelves, offers to colleges are rescinded… People in power join the mob. They cancel people, fear being canceled, and rotely deny (with the requisite condescending impatience) that Cancel Culture exists.

For J.K. Rowling, it is somewhat true that she has not been canceled, but that’s only because she’s too big, too popular. Really, she does not need to be sacrificed for the cause, unlike the editors of Variety or Bon Appetit. (Does anyone remember their names, or even those incidents?) Going after Rowling is symbolic only, a sacrifice akin to the bread and wine consumed in a church like Homer Simpson’s: no one’s body is breaking at that altar, no blood is spilled. It’s just a symbol. The real target is you. Those of us who never aspire to write Harry Potter or even the Genie with the Magic Bikini get the message: shut up. Shut up. Shut up or you are phobic, racist, hateful, whatever. Shut up or we will take your job, your hobbies, and your platforms away from you.

3.

In the past week Twitter suspended a conservative’s anonymous Twitter account called Spotted Toad, probably for expressing skepticism about gender transitions among teens and pre-teens, but no one knows why for sure. Also in the past week, a leftist writer named Alex Gutentag’s account was suspended for reasons unknown, likely for expressing too much skepticism about various U.S. Covid policies. Both accounts have been restored. Both writers also have friends and readers in prominent places.

What will happen if you dissent? Will writers at the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal tag @Jack or @ElonMusk if some illiberal moderator (that is, censor) at Twitter suspends you? If someone complains about your normie belief, will anyone come to your aid? And if they do, will anyone at a faceless Silicon Valley corporation listen?

May as well say what you want in a place that has already committed to letting you.